My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my shower just felt like jesus cried on me. like he shed tears just for my shower.
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
I can't trust your balls anymore.
She meowed at me. Repeatedly. Then she asked what was wrong with me because I didn't understand her.
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
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