Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
i never told you how having a club foot got me laid
she said she didn't want to sleep with me again because I wasnt a generous lover. I ignored her slight moustache, didnt i? i think thats pretty damn generous
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
There is a drunk marine passed out on my porch. Mandy wouldn't sleep with him, Can you please come remove him?
Vodka, rum, moonshine, I don't care, just bring like 5gallons.
Was reaching for my vibrator this morning out of my nightstand and strained my neck muscle. I'm getting so old.
Yeah, I'm pretty glad I chose you to have drunken, sloppy birthday sex with.
That's the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
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