You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
Yeah, half my ass was burnt and I was missing a shoe. I'm blaming you for the shoe.
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
You wouldn't be the first friend to shit himself in the last 7 days
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
Just got a 200 dollar safe, two jars, and a 500 pack of rubber bands.. This doesn't SCREAM drug dealer does it?
...you should fill the cart some more
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
My mom just said "okay girls, the ONLY thing i ask is that you stay sober Saturday afternoon, until halfway through lunch. And you don't wear that crystal camo hat. This is a funeral, not a tailgate party"
Best wishes.
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
She just texted me saying "come over and eat me out, my vagina smells like honey glazed ham." I know I shouldn't be, but i'm just so curious.
Randomize
