i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
Remember that time I came into your room after taking a muscle relaxant and we argued about what state has the longest coastline?
It's pretty bad when the convenient store clerk can tell you that you're earlier than usual for visiting the store.
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
... there are chew marks on my license. I have no idea.
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
I got inside last night via doggy door
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
No actually you're a pro. You puked on the cab ride, and managed to completely contain it in your purse. the cabbie was even impressed.
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
Randomize
