its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
my mom just left...time to break out that water bottle of wine that I sewed into my teddy bear
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
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