My e-date is really photogenic. Real-life not so much
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
If I had a vagina, my apartment would have been the Atlantic
i may or may not have bought a plane ticket for a russian cam girl to fly here. also, can you spot me $300 on rent?
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
Randomize
