did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
I'm so high I used the top vent on my dashboard to heat up a cheeseburger
Whoa. I woke up to 10 new text messages. All about bacon.
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently I kept telling people I was a pro tennis player again...
Why is there a water bottle full of red wine on my desk this morning?
See you tonight.
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
Should I be concerned that the new guy I'm seeing just referred to my stealing a sailboat in college while drunk as "wholesome"?
Yes, you can glue plastic eyes to my dick and take pictures while I'm asleep. If you tell anyone I said you could do that Ima fight you.
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
Randomize