Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
THIS IS EXACTLY WHY YOU SHOULDA FUCKED BEFORE YOU MADE HIM YOUR BOYFRIEND, CURVED DICKS ARE NOT OK
Rum and your dick are involved. You're relying on the unreliable narrator.
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
Randomize
