its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
I'm not asking you to commit. I'm politely asking your penis to be my friend.
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
I don't remember coming in last night, but apparently I ate a piece of pizza because when I woke up I had pizza crust stuck to the back of my thighs.
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
I spilled a whole plate of queso and salsa on my bed so I'm just eating it off my sheets with chips. How's your night going?
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
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