i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
i literally in my bathroom watching tv from across the hall while trying not to fall asleep with my dog keeping my feet warm. wednesday's shouldnt be like this
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
When you put my balls in your mouth i just want to buy you expensive gifts...you know what i mean?
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
Stop calling my penis "Fat Jesus"
we watched a guy take a shot of tequila while riding a unicycle
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
Randomize