We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
Knowing that porn stars want to fall in love is the weirdest thing I've found to be beautiful recently. I'm so lonely.
I should know better than to open your texts at the grocery store
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
the only decorations on the Christmas tree were twinkle lights, condoms, and empty natty cans. I do love a classy holiday party
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