when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
I am going to invent a chocolate mix for sperm.
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
During breaking dawn, he leaned over and asked me why she would have to worry about her period since she essentially just married a walking super-absorbant tampon... It was the best way to ruin those movies for me.
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
Lost feeling in my face, my shoe and had a nose bleed. That's not wings. Fuck red bull.
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
My boob job is like a master key that gets me in any door, any party and anyone’s pants! They’re magical!
Randomize