how hairy? two words: wookie tits
i'm naked playing bejeweled blitz in your bed. this is both a forewarning and an apology
Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
just ran into my gynecologist at the liquor store... i think she's found the source of my problems
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
Between the uncertainly of my bowels today, and the distance the bar is to my house, remember I am doing this for you and our mutual appreciation of alcoholism.
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
I don't wanna shit myself again in 2015
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
Randomize
