so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
swear to god, just saw some chick dressed in a full chicken costume buying eggs and telling the cashier that she "just wants her babies back."
buy whatever she's on. a lot of it.
I'm on the strip, it's like a mini new years eve. Some girl just got taken away on a stretcher with her meter margarita in her hand claiming it's trophy for being awesome. Damn tourists are lightweights.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did we have sex last night or did we just wake up naked covered in oil?
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He asked when the last time I had sex was. I had to look at the clock and respond "12 hours ago"
He apologized for cumming on my leg, but not for ghosting me for 3 weeks before :(
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
I'm not sure what happened. There's a frozen waffle in the floor and he's walking around with a curtain rod and making planes out of bread slices...
I don't feel like that was meant as a compliment, but really still feels like one
please don't ironically join a cult
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