barbara walters just said penis...
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
the best days in LIFE are when you realize you arent pregnant
You kept running into the wall most of the night. When people asked you what you were doing you told them you were the kool-aid man and there was little kids on the other side of the wall who needed your juice
Hurry there's a dancing lesbian. She's a jumper and has impeccable jazz hands.
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
How’s big weiner McGee?
I’m going to ask you one last time to call him Matt and he’s fine thank you very much
Randomize
