TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
Ugh why can't people just be grateful for my penis
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
I woke up just like any other Wednesday. Naked on the floor, hungover and covered head to toe in lube
Randomize
