He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
That dude you fucked three years ago just won Jeopardy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
How did I end up in some random dudes car?
Some guy came up to you and asked if you knew how to drive stick.
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
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