i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
I guess I gave him a 20 minute play-by-play of the first three sections of R. Kelly's 'trapped in a closet.'
I pretended I didn't remember seeing him hookup with that freshman, and he pretended he didn't remember seeing me hookup with that old guy. We have a beautiful and unawkward friendship.
you're good to come back. The bouncer pulled me aside and told me. He also said you have nothing to worry about and that you have an awesome "upper punch" or some shit
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
Showing up to Easter hungover, late, and covered in black an blues from pole dancing. Daughter of the year.
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
Should I have spent my entire pay check on Crown Royal and LSD? No. Do I regret it? Also, no.
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
OKAY THAT'S CREEPY AND I'D PROBABLY ACCIDENTLY ORGASM
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
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