he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
Me and the cabbie are stopping on the way at a sit down restaurant to eat. My life is so sad.
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
I accidentally sent my dad a very explicit Star Wars fanfiction and he replied with "That was great!"
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
Randomize
