i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...
I know. I almost started crying. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT A TURN ON?!
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
You told me to keep you from drinking, but we both know I'm not that kind of friend.
I'm running on two hours of sleep, a shot of vodka, and half of a granola bar. I can't be held responsible for what I do.
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
I woke up to a bum peeing outside my window, and he said, "This is embarrassing for you."
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
Randomize
