I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
Guy Accidentally Starts A Group Chat With All The Girls He’s Talking To And Gets Absolutely Roasted
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
She looked at me and said there is a 90% chance I am going to puke in the next 10 minutes. 10 minutes later she is in jack in the box throwing up. She has amazing timing.
The Internet Is Obsessed With This Stripper Who Dropped It Low Just To Eat A Slice Of Pizza
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
There are 27 signatures on my ass. What the hell happened last night?
Every time someone made a cup you congratulated them by letting them sign your ass.
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?