GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
You made everyone who was on the patio sit on the floor and join your "ship" because you were the Captain. It was cool though. You let me be your 1st Mate.
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
Pretty sure I just heard the turkey yell "don't put me in there" as it was going in the oven. way too high for this holiday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
Damn why is there no horse blowjob emoji?
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
What do you bring to an "I'm getting divorced party?"
.......Shattered dreams and tequila?
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
Randomize