just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
Just got a orange juice for my grandma, put gin in it without thinking. She's having a good morning.
I blacked out, fell off a swingset, and thought I was Liz Lemon for almost an hour.
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
I just woke up hand cuffed to the bar and shirtless, so yeah I think I need you to come get me.
Got caught peeing in public. Sucks. It was a police station. Sucks worse.
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
Randomize
