I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
i'm surprised you didn't wake up. like i literally came when he was fingering me as i was spooning with you and all you did was mumble "that's a good idea, mom" and pull the sheets away from me.
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
Currently having to re-watch episodes of Lost that I've only partially seen because you distracted me with your vagina
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
Randomize
