Add "its too hot" to reasons why I don't get fucked anymore
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
And at least you didn't have a dinner of Ranch Pringles and Double Stuff Oreos. I forgot that part of being single.
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
I just learned that the grill marks on a Burger King burger patty are actually previously burnt on there with a radioactive spray-on liquid and McDonald's french fries are actually 5% potato.
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