my ass just sighed. even my farts are tired.
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
I will tell my future kids about the time I went to the bar with a stomach virus. Like a champ.
You threw an open can of pop at me while I was lying on the floor babbling and drooling about how I need to be alone forever, me and my leaking face.
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
So I'm texting her. How do I steer the conversation toward "I honestly would be fine never seeing you again"?
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
Randomize
