They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
I'm bakin' bread in my pussy!
What?
I have a yeast infection.
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
there is nothing like a happy birthday present when you wake up with a bow on your vagina.
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.
On my way
I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man's heart.
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
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