if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Got to see someone fall down the stairs while holding hot coffee and a folder full of papers. Best Monday ever.
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
So I saw the nuva ring just lying on the counter at Planned Parenthood...did u know it's just a ring? I could go to the Dollar tree buy a plastic bracelet and shove it up there instead.
You do that. Then go have lots of unprotected with your harem of booty calls and see how that works out for you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What wine did you feed Jack? Might not want to waste the good stuff on kitties. Kitties only get box wine.
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
I can never have sex in Utah again. The altitude had me breathing like a fat kid going up stairs.
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
Text me if something catches fire and I will put pants on
Well obviously we have a ghost in the house who’s taking showers in your bathroom and doing our cocaine.
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