Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just said he was the Jesus of alcoholics.
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
ttyl tear gas
Ok fuckface listen up and listen good. 1.calling dibs on a chick out of your league is like applying for a job with a highlight video 2. dont fucking ski down the stairs again 3. if you do, put it on your highlight video
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
I'm too over dressed and drunk for this emergency vets office
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
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