So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
we just toasted to your mouth on alex's balls at the bar
you know something has gone wrong in your life when you've gotten a court order to stay away from ALL mc donalds.
she's my drunk super hero.
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We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
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I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
I think I just figured out how to make weed tea in the coffeemaker.
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
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