He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
I got my little bro high for the first time... Turns out the two of us stoned together is a mess. We spent 10 minutes trying to communicate with each other using just our eyebrows.
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
Mcnellies. I'm drunk enough that you have a window. Capitalize.
His constant posting of "inspirational" Taylor Swift quotes over the past 3 days has me a little worried. It's like, holy shit dude, you're almost 30.
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
I know it's New Year's Eve but if you're going to have a bunch of chicks playing strip go fish in our apartment I need a heads up.
Randomize
