you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
You told me to remind you that the bruise on your ass is from when you danced on the table at Ziggy's, saw a cop and tried to 'fly away'.
I'm not saying I haven't been that drunk. I'm just saying I haven't been that drunk and then have cops buy me shots.
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
When is the right time to ask your new roommate for her school schedule so she doesn't walk in on you fucking some rando in the kitchen in the middle of the afternoon?
His ex told me that she wanted me to "take care of" him but from the way she said it I couldn't tell if she wants me to look after him or murder him.
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
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