im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
He got about halfway through singing "Drift Away" before he passed out and broke my coffee table.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
Thankfully US customs doesnt have a checkbox for bringing semen into the country because my hair would still be in CDC quarantine
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
Honestly I was sitting in managerial accounting thinking "I really need to get my shit together and stop drinking so much wine." But when you asked I realized... it's wine. It's always a yes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
Forget about letting a 70-year-old man suck on my tits for coke... telling my new boyfriend about it was the poor life choice.
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
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