ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
dont like to call her my roomate, too cordial. i refer to her as the whore that was assigned to live with me
Dude I'm drinking a martini out of a water bottle, I've become my parents.
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
Note to self: Don't teach the naked lap rule in beer pong until after youve made a cup..
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
You kept trying to make cocktails with my protein powder last night...
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
Dude just walked up to me, gave me his number and said, if this number ever calls its my penis,better keep that one handy. I cant lie its the best pick up line ever, im calling his penis.
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