Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
Finally get to put my practical writing degree to use! I'm writing a craigslist ad for a threesome
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
Apparently I drunkenly told him I was going to ride him to the rodeo and break him like a bronco, then I stole his nachos and beer. Adulting is hard!!!
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
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