How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
i hope push ups and a ton of orange juice gets rid of chlamydia
i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
remember when mike pissed in his pants and then put a double cheeburger in the pocketsss of said wet pants for "safe keeping"? yea drunker then that.
Febreezed myself at a stop light on the way to the IRS office. Judgmental glare from some old lady in the car next to me, thumbs up from her husband.
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
My brother didnt wanna sleep with her because she was my friend. Did I miss the memo where we're not supposed to be fucking each others friends? Oh well too late.
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
She proposed we share a dildo. Hopefully she was joking.
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
Randomize
