just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
please hurry. your mom just evil laughed to herself in the kitchen like she's plotting my death.
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't even know. I woke up to a text from someone named Vick saying he was 'legit worried' that I had herpes.
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
Well, I tried to shit into my refrigerator. It was a rough night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
Sad realization: so long as I use this sleep apnea machine, I will never be the little spoon!
I think God is sending me all these 20 year olds to make up for wasting my 20's in that crappy ass marriage. Thanks Big Guy!
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
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