dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
So random guy from last night came over tonight. I told myself I wasn't going to sleep with him but he had some killer dirty talk and a big penis in his arsenal...what was I supposed to do? Supposedly he lost his virginity to his wife and since their divorce a year ago I'm the 1st girl he's slept with, I feel like I just re-took his virginity...I feel like a rockstar.
Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
We tried the hang n bang, remember? You ruined it by crying and telling me you loved me while blowing me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
Randomize