scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
coulda been worse. everyone in the drunk tank got free mcdonalds breakfast
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
Took me 12 hours to be sober again. Shitshow mission accomplished
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital.
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
Did you actually just quote Ace Ventura during a sext!?
You know it
Dammit now I have to marry you
Randomize
