I'm totally gay for Miss Californiaaaaaa
oh sweet, sweet irony
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
i wish there were pregnant emoticons
took 5 apple pie shots. caution: flames. not digestable.
I need a horse. I don't think you can get a DUI on a living creature.
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
I just dropped a paperclip into my cleavage while talking to the company president... That's an awkward moment.
Did you at least offer to let him get it out??
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
I just started an apology with "so I'm sorry about throwing the Brita at your head last night..."
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
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