WTF. you left me with no condoms and you ate all my mac and cheese. scumbag.
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
Pls don't use the words alligator, purple, and sperm in the same sentence ever again.
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
Just got the test results back; apparently I'm red-green colorblind. this explains the past 18 years of my life and i'm wondering why i didn't realize this sooner
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
Ugh. I need to go to the store, but I'm too lazy. Whatever shall I do? That girls still passed out. I should steal her car
Randomize
