that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
Did you ever stop and think that god invented whiskey dick specifically for me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like delivery guys should know that when you order lunch for one and answer the door wearing sweatpants, there's no need to say "Happy Valentine's Day."
What are your plans?
Get picked up. Convince you to leave work. Smoke. Drink. Fly helicopters.
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
I wasn't going to drink tonight, but was reminded this is the anniversary of prohibition being repealed. If I don't, then I am against my profession of bartending and anti-American, right?
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
Randomize