woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
i just unintentionally masturbated to my own facebook picture
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
Cuz its complicated and I hate complicated and I miss your penis
Roomie questionaires don't ask any of the important questions like "how do you feel about one night stands" and "will you judge me post-walk of shame"
I feel so bad for your roommate
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
I really don't know how I went from having a few drinks to waging war against ghosts in my apartment but here we are
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
Hey, remember that time a week ago when we walk-of-shamed literally down the Vegas Strip at 8:45am and I had one broken heel?
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
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