I wish I only lived at night.
maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
I smell like booze and the valet literally buckled me in, def top 3 walks of shame
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
Shit. I'm running the whole hotel right now. The front desk girl had to run home because she left her vibrator on the counter and her brother, mom, and grandmother surprised her and are showing up to her place before she gets off work. This will end badly no matter what.
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
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