i'm in his bathroom *freshening up* and he not only has a hairdryer... but a straightener. get me out of here... NOW
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
I'm soaked in beer, and I think blood. Why did we think we could tap a keg with a hammer?
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
Can you help me get ready before work? I need a look that says I'm-happy-to-help-but-I'm-hungover-so-leave-your-attitude-at-the-door-because-I'm-not-taking-anyone's-shit-today.
I don't want my vagina anymore.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
The sex would be better if it wasn’t interrupted because his home detention ankle monitor needed charging. At least I know he’s not cheating on me
Do you even hear yourself?
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
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