Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
don't ever try to run hungover. just puked mid-run in front of an old couple that were going for a walk. they were horrified.
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
she reminds me of the first time i discovered masturbation. that's how you know it's true love.
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
I can't leave. She doesn't trust me and my penis being out in the world without supervision.
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
Seriously. Come back. I've had two beers for breakfast so far. The third will be for lunch since it's already 12.
I'm sitting on the floor singing Bruno mars while they cook and occasionally pet me
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
Randomize
