Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
Just had a drunken guest at my hotel threaten to "throw a fuckin fireball at my face"
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
Whoever I saved in my phone as "Jackpot" last night has your keys.
I keep confusing the name of her and her dog. Both are appropriate.
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My cab driver just started a conversation with "Three years ago I pleaded guilty..." Check on me later tonight please.
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
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