In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
If I banged a coworker last night but didn't enjoy it can I put it down on my timesheet?
I hijacked a bellboy cart and rolled into the party dancing on it
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
I lost a bet last night, now I have to name the baby Fetty Wap, regardless of gender. Riley is going to kill me.
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
Randomize
