hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
I hereby state that I am over the age of 18. If I am not of age to purchase or consume alcohol products, I hereby acknowledge that I have not received any alcohol products from said party host. Also, in the event of injury or death, said party host is not to be held accountable. Please reply with your full name and today's date for your e-signature". *note: no text, no entry.*
Sorry bro, just a precaution. You know, ever since the "Jake incident". What a douche.
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
I spent $31 at mcdonalds last night. Threw my nuggets all over the yard, ate them out of the snow, picked a fight about it, vomited, then passed out.
Naked.
This text constitutes a formal request for sexual congress under the terms of our Relationship Agreement.
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
Randomize
