Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
It doesn't count as drinking alone if you're making rum cake with it.
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
my mouth is as dry as a post-menopausal camel on antidepressant's vagina.
Well, I found my bra. It's in my glove compartment with a half-eaten Snickers bar and a Jesus bookmark.
Let's be honest, your relationships fail because the man you're looking for is the equivalent of an intellectual blow-up doll.
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
Sorry about kicking you last night but you don’t mess with a girls margarita bucket. Ever
Randomize
